Look, you know I love Keith Murphy, right? The sports anchor at Channel 13? Unlike most local sports guys, he's actually funny. He'll talk shit about Bachman, Kiernan, Kirk Ferentz, St. Zach, pretty much anyone, and it's always a riot. It's when he tries to be poignant that he gets into trouble. Tonight, talking about Appalachian State's historic victory over Michigan in college football, Murphy said, "This is one of the reasons we love sports: Sometimes, David beats Goliath."
Aw, don't make me go all biblical on you, Keith. Read your Book of Samuel. David will always beat Goliath. Because it isn't a David-and-Goliath story unless David beats Goliath. If he doesn't, then it's just Goliath of Gath, all six-cubits-and-a-span of him, kicking ass and chewing bubble gum.
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